Packing, unpacking, repacking

And so that is how it is - the three sorts of packing. After five years, I am well and truly sick of it. But clearly not enough to do it again this year!

The official transcript arrived hooray! And it is correct. I do have that Bachelor of Music. You bet I do!

I thought about not going to bed at all the night before I jumped on a plane. I had to wake up at 4am anyway. I thought it might have been amusing just to stay up all night, but decided against it (going to bed at 12.45am) because I really wanted to sleep in my fairly comfy bed!

I assembled my first piece of Ikea furniture this evening. Admittedly, with a bit of help! But still. I'm pretty excited about it - four bits of wood, twelve screws results in one bedside table that isn't the two boxes I've had stacked for the previous two years!

And I remember that when I go away for holiday, the geographical distance is a really good way of distancing myself from work. Even if I do some organisation away from the centre of it all. The work has just flooded in. And thankfully I also have had a few requests to play for stuff. Keepin' busy, that's how it is. I didn't really anticipate having to sit down and do much work this year though, and so it's a bit of a shock to have to do it! But I shall persist and hopefully stuff will get done (though unfortunately not magically).

Still no sign...

...of the supposed transcript. But I called and Andrew Hall with the very nice deep voice and he checked my record and told me that I had indeed graduated. Phew!

I also noticed that my previous post was titled "How Strage", rather than "How Strange". The second of those was the intended.

I have been working a little bit - at least it keeps me occupied for a day. Plus, the woman I'm working for is actually a family friend, so it's pretty chilld out, and we've been going adventuring to see clients and stuff, and she also cooks amazing lunch for us and I help her and learn to cook! Woo!

The Moleskine is filling up a bit - I realised I actually have some work to work on, some thoughts to think about, some plans to put together. But it's quite difficult when one has few guidelines on how to do it. I kinda know what I want to do, but it might take some convincing and some money (always in short supply). Sigh.

How strage

So my academic transcript arrived in the mail yesterday. It was pretty exciting to see the culmination of it all. Until I got to the bottom:

Course(s) completed:
Bachelor of Commerce
with a major in: Economics

Well, that was all good, except for the glaringly obvious ommission. Where is my Bachelor of Music? I had a panic attack for about five minutes as I went to calculate that I had completed enough points. Affirmative. Phew.
Now I just have to figure out this pesky thing.

Our Christmas tree is still up, I have a pile of books to read, a few more operas-on-dvds to watch, and have been relaxing muchly - 'tis a sweet life! But it has been hot and a little uncomfortable at times. I've been shopping a bit in the post-Christmas sales, with the unsurprising result of not having bought anything in the Christmas to New Year period. But don't worry, I redeemed myself by spending a bit more in recent days (hah!).

This year has taken a bit more shape, which is exciting. I'm no longer a full-time member of the 'I Don't Know' Club; I now belong in the 'This is What I'm Doing' Club. In quick summary, this is a brief list of what is to happen in 2010:
The Opera School
Queen's stuff
Chiasma Trio
Another trio (!) - yet un-named
Other chamber music stuffs? Other projects
Stuff at Jude's (yay!)
Work will hopefully be made up of gigs, accompanying, other music-y stuffs
Chamber Camp in September (the only thing that was in pen in my diary for a while!)

And I was worried about it being empty....I don't think so anymore!

A long trip home

So, I'm finally home. But getting home was far more difficult than I anticipated.
Ed sent me to the airport - I had left lots of time, which was cool. The flight left at 9.25pm, and I'd arrived by 7.45pm - plenty of time! But when I arrived, the terminal was full of people, people were sitting all over, not necessarily in a line. There was general chaos, the board flashed flights that were 'Delayed' or (even worse) 'Cancelled'.

So, it turns out that a Telstra cable to T3 (where the Virgin Blue terminal is set up) was cut and all computer-operated systems were not functioning. Manual check-ins, serious delays, too many people to comprehend at any one time. All we could do was wait. And wait we did. And we waited until they announced that there were only going to be four (later two, as two were cancelled due to airport curfews) flights (operated by Virgin Blue) leaving Melbourne Airport. Ours was not one of them. :(

So then, we had to proceed downstairs to see what accommodation we could be fixed up with. There was a massive line. Apparently they were trying to accommodate four to five thousand people. That is a lot of people!
But somehow we managed to find ourselves at the front of a second line, and put our names down on the accommodation list. Then there was more waiting. Lots of it. There were all sorts of phone calls (many!) and eventually they started calling out people's names to board buses to head to the hotel. This all took a long time, and at close to midnight, was pretty draining. A busload of us were taken to The Sebel in Albert Park which turns out is a 4.5 star hotel - can't complain! Admittedly, we took some photos of the hotel, because it's been a while since I stayed in a hotel (and such a nice one at that!). We made sure not to touch anything from the mini-bar (ridiculously over-priced!), had an awful view of the next building, but the bed was comfortable, there were fluffy white towels and the only thing not provided was a toothbrush. But at about 1.45am, I finally crashed into bed.

There wasn't much sleep to be had either, unfortunately...back home, my mum was crazily trying to reschedule a flight and I got woken up by a text that arrived at close to 4am telling me that she'd managed to get us on a 9.25am flight - exactly 12 hours after the original flight. Which meant getting to the airport well before the hotel's check-out time of 11am. I wasn't all too smart about it all - it would have been nice to use the hotel's facilities, but was keen to avoid a hot Melbourne day. We got to the airpot at about 7.15am (far too early after a frantic night!). We ate Macca's for breakfast (gross, but wonderful simultaneously), sat around, stood in a line for a while and were delayed (again!)because:
i) the previous flight was delayed;
ii) the flight was over-booked and they had to ask for volunteers to get off that flight
iii) we waited for other passengers from a connecting flight (which was delayed) to get on the plane.

But finally we were off to Perth. Finally. It was such a relief to be back on the other side of the country. Even though I really love Melbourne and the people there; it would have been hugely awkward to have said bye to everybody and then ring people up and murmur, "Ummm...I'm sitll here..." Hah.

So that is the saga that was.


In previous news (in concise manner):
1. Moving out was painful (for my back) and a bit hectic, but thankfully worked out in the end.
2. Tasmania was wonderful. A fantastic experience - learning, musical, trip-wise. Will have to go back there to actually go on holiday. Walked places (muchly!), walked hills (very large ones..). Made friends (yay!). Had a cool piano tutor (amazing woman!).
3. Lived out of suitcase for another week and a bit. Amess St was fun. Reherasals were good. Wasn't 'home' much.
4. Masters Recitals: horn one was good; page-turning was fun, not being able to play electronics due to technical glitches were not so fun...
Vocal one was also good - much more involved! But went really well. Love French.
5. Wedding was good, as was reception. Fun times were had by all.
6. Was good to see two friends from Perth in Melbourne. Yay!

Am yet to catch up on all the sleep from this year...but hopefully it is getting there. Have some appointments (you know, parent-organised) but apart from that, will hopefully be learning some concerti, sleeping, going to the beach, possibly learning guitar....

Themes of 2010

Shostakovich. Mozart. Strauss. E Flat Major. My drink - LLB. No other :) Local hangouts. Dumplings. Yum-cha. Calamari. It's free on 3! Collaborations. Yes. No. Up. Down. Black and white. Black and silver. Collaborative study.

So. Scared.

I hope I don't get lost.
Probably not on email, so ring me......

The stuff you do and the stuff you don't

If you've known me for a long time, or even just a short time, or have followed any of my progress through life of late, you'll know that this year has been filled with some of the most amazing highs and deep lows. You'll know that I've smiled lots and very widely this year with some people, but you might or mightn't know that I've probably also cried more this year than the previous four combined.

You'll know of the decision I have come to make that I wanted to pursue music full-time in my life. But you'll also know that my Plan A went astray. As did my Plan B. And you'll know that I don't make Plan Cs because I usually go with A, or at least, B.

And you'll know that I have amazing friends who support and love me. But you'll also know that I've found it hard to devote as much as I like to all of them individually. You'll know that I have a bunch of really close friends for different things. But possibly no one person crosses all those different things.

You'll know that I spent the last five years asking myself the same question. And have come to a sort-of conclusion by now. But you'll also know that I love learning just for the sake of it.

You'll know that I am a little bit crazy and say yes to all sorts of things. But you'll also know that there are some times that I think my youthful enthusiasm gets me into all sorts of situations that are possibly way beyond me.

You'll know that I'm a bit of a perfectionist (I think it comes with being one of those pianists). But you mightn't know that I'm getting really good at faking it too. Handy, but not necessarily good all the time.

You'll know that I like having the next week of my life planned out and if you want to catch up, you'll need to make sure I put it in my diary and allocate time for it. But you'll also know that I have only vague plans for next year and what it looks like. And you'll know that I am so scared about not being able to pay rent, pursue what I actually want to, not learn in the way I want to, not achieve the things I want to.

You'll know that my next week is fully booked. But I have no idea where to put the other things. And sometimes I think you think you know that there isn't enough time. But you mightn't know that if you really want it and ask, I'd make time.

You'll know that if often looks like I have it all together and have it all under control. But you mightn't know that I'm padlling as fast as I can underneath the surface. And sometimes it sure doesn't feel like it's fast enough.

You'll know of the amazing opportunities that have been thrown at me. But you mightn't know that it hurts so much not to take them all, because I fear so much that I won't get anything like it again.

You'll know that I sleep about six to seven hours per night - and it's definitely not enough when it all catches up. And you'll know that I didn't avoid to manage the university student typical coffee addiction within the last four weeks of uni.

You'll know that I operate at about 70% on any given day. But even I don't really know what it's like to feel 100%. You'll know that I probably need to take better care of myself. But I think I need other people to look after me, because I know I probably wouldn't.

You'll know that I'm a bit of a workaholic. But you mightn't know that I also manage to waste a lot of time doing I-don't-know-what. And you mightn't know that there are some days I just want to laze around and do nothing, but you'd know that I'd rather usually do that with other people.

You should know that I love and care so much for my friends that I would do almost anything for them - and I get upset when I can't. You might see it as favouritism, coldness to some or others, but you'd know it if you were on the receiving end. You'd perhaps know if you can hear the smile when I pick up the phone, or saw it just before I did.

You'll know that I don't like putting people out of their way. But you mightn't know that if I ever do, it's either because I really like you (and think that you might like me enough to do so too) or I really don't and couldn't really care less. Having said that, it is not my intentional aim though to do so.

You'll know that I love this city, most because of the people I've met and the friends I've made, but also because of the things that I've done in it, and the memories I have of certain things. But you'll know that I also have a little bit of an itch to go elsewhere, but I'm so scared of leaving all this to somewhere new and unknown, or even old and now-unknown.

not the daily grind

But at the same time, yes it is....go figure.
The ups and downs continue, but perhaps with less volatility. Heck, this sounds like a comparison of the Australian economy pre- and post-1980s reform. Wow. NERD!

And so it goes...some of the ups:
*music-king
*concerts - both playing and watching
*rehearsals, intense tutes
*amazing singing. That made me almost cry on both occasions :)
*celebrating with friends
*remembering what awesome friends i have
*tramming adventures
*eating adventures
*'study breaks'-cum-adventures
*randomness
*popping-ins to say hi
*running into friends
*crazy photos (in the library!)
*spontaneous excursions
*talking for hours
*communal study sessions
*good food
*good friends


and some of the downs:
*can't read it!!
*what does it all mean???
*study for hours
*study unproductively for hours!
*realising how much I don't know
*obnoxious people

And those with no specific category:
*The 'Don't Know' Club slowly morphing into the 'I think I may have a bit sorted out' Club. Don't worry, we'll see be there for each other!
*Big ideas. Scary. But cool.
*Making some decisions. Scary also.
*Sorting out the short-term life. CRAZY!
*Knowing the lines
*P.R.!
*Stuff to look forward to. But so much to do around it!

My questions:
*Isn't it obvious?
*Why is it like that?
*What would it be like?
*Why don't you just tell me?
*What would you think?
*How would you react?
*Would that be weird? (Because it's totally out of character)
*What's going to happen?
*Can we still do that stuff?
*Do you want to?
*How can we make it work?
*How can I make it happen?
*Are we just dancing around the issues?

Yup, I'm a question-asker.....